You’re about to make a decision that scares the living DAYLIGHTS out of you. You know it’s right, but it comes with a lot of emotions you really just don’t want to feel.
Ten minutes after you do it you’ll feel guilty, lonely, embarrassed, and really, really freakin’ sad. You won’t want to do it at all, and as soon as you do, you’ll wish you could take it back. This might be the most devastated, crazy, and afraid you’ve ever felt in your whole life. Trust me, you’re going to want to just undo the whole thing.
But you can’t undo it simply because you also know it’s right. You’ve thought about it up and down, and there just isn’t a way to avoid it anymore. You need to face it head on. Jump, collide, just do it.
Over the next ten days, you’ll still hate it. You’ll be drowning in these emotions, wondering if you’ll ever make your way out. You will analyze your decision and tell yourself the million reasons it was the wrong decision. You’ll even try to devise a plan to reverse the whole thing.
But you can’t reverse it because it’s still right. It doesn’t feel right, your stomach feels like an empty pit and you want to try to make your own comfort in any way possible.
Well, girl, crawl under the covers if you must. Eat a carton of Ben and Jerry’s. But whatever you do, don’t go back on your decision. It only gets better from here.
On the tenth day, pick yourself up. Pull yourself out of bed, get dressed, take a shower for goodness’ sake. Do something you love, find inspiration. Listen to music, read, sit in the park. Visit with friends, cook, start a new project.
Because it’s still the right decision. Your emotions are still there, but they don’t need to be in the front seat anymore. Don’t forget about them, but put the sadness in the back and keep right on driving.
In ten months, look around. You’ve made it. You’ll know it because you’ll feel light and free. That heavy, oppressive weight will be gone. Your sadness, loneliness and anger will be a distant memory. All you’re left with is strength and confidence. Take a deep breath and spend some time getting to know yourself.