For me, this was a decision between being able to predict my life or not having any control over what happens next.
Did I want to stay locked in a place where I knew what to expect day in and day out? Where it was unhealthy and unstable, but at least I knew it would follow a pattern? I could expect the same ups and downs. Some years they’d be better, some years they’d be worse- but I knew what was coming. I was never surprised.
The other choice: Lose control over everything. Where will I go? Who will I meet? What’s the next step for me? Will I be Ok? All of it is unknown, and nothing can be predicted.
But, if my coin was in the air, I’d wish for change. So, I went for it.